Even in this photo, you can almost smell the vinigar Baldanza uses to slick back his hair.
Ben Baldanza, the former star of Who’s the Boss and current CEO of Evil Spirit Airlines (no link provided due to Hipster Travel Guide’s Boycott), says Hero Senator Charles “Shove your overhead baggage tax out” Schumer just doesn’t know what he’s talking about.
In an interview with Fox Business News, which also hates Sen. Charles “The Lib” Schumer, Baldanza, which is what you call Tony with no hair, said, “Chuck Schumer does a great job for his constituents and the state of New York and the country, but in this case, he seems to have spoken without knowing all the facts.”
“He ignored two really good points. One is security lines will be shorter and less frustration. And it’s also safer,” Baldanza added.
OK, we’ll take it from here.
What a douche. Chuck didn’t miss a thing. If people pay the overhead baggage fine, thus 
lining Baldanza’s pockets — which is what Evil Spirit wants — then there will be just as many bags stuffed into the overhead bins as there are today.
The planes won’t be safer than they are today. Security lines won’t be any shorter than they are today.
Now, of course, Baldanza may be thinking that fewer people will be flying Evil Spirit so he does have a point. Lines will be shorter at Evil Spirit terminals because there will simply be fewer people.
"Give me your money, give me your money, give me your money, no, more money."
As for safer? WTF? Don’t tie additional profits to safety, that’s Homeland Security‘s job. Baldanza’s logic is even dumber than saying those Body Scanners are going to make flights safer. They don’t.
Terrorist can most likely pack their evil materials in a bag that can fit under their seat just as easily put it in their overhead. (Also, they won’t have to stand up to pull anything out, so people won’t see what he or she is doing.)
Look, it’s OK for Baldanza to be a greedy scum sucker. That’s his job, push profits and make passengers as uncomfortable as possible — a skill Evil Spirit was good at even before imposing this high-skies robbery. But just own it.
And we’ll continue our Boycott.
Now if you want to watch the whole Baldanza interview on FOX, here’s the video.
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