As a general rule, I don’t like sailing on boats. You either have to sedate me with a cocktail of Dramamine laced with elephant narcotics or strap me to the ship’s mast with my life vest on a la Bill Murray’s character in the cinema classic, What About Bob? Safety first, I always say.

But the call of the Caribbean is strong, life is short, and the pachyderm pills were kicking in, so I figured, Ahoy! Let’s do this.

Plus, it was a press trip, and peer pressure from a feral group of near-homeless travel writers is truly a bitch.

So, under the trusted commandeering of boat captain Damian Poujade, we removed our shoes and hopped aboard Leeward Islands Charters’ Spirit of St. Kitts, a majestic 78-foot catamaran and the biggest in their fleet.

The professional service and hospitality of the staff was second to none, and it’s no secret that these guys love what they do— deck hand Denzel “Yardie” Duncan dazzled us with an impromptu dance with effortless finesse against the backdrop of the open seas—and quite possibly have the world’s best job.

After we docked, we headed back to the island’s foremost hotel and our temporary home, the St.Kitts Marriott Resort and Royal Beach Casino, known for its unparalleled customer service and endless amenities, including:

three pools with swim-up bar,

unfettered beachfront access,

a world-class casino, and

a premier, 18-hole championship golf course.

For dinner, we sat under the stars with a steel drum band playing in the background. Happy endings, anyone?

So when it’s my time to buy the farm, I’d like to find myself sailing the cerulean Caribbean waters on a catamaran with an ice-cold Ting in hand, listening to soul-soothing reggae while watching the rolling hills of St. Kitts slowly amble past as the bloodshot sun quietly closes the day… heaven, or something close to it.