What do you get at Lords? Well, quite a look that’s for sure. It’s very, very Miami. Over the top Miami. Bordering on kistchy Miami. I’m not a fan of the Blondie and Elizabeth Taylor portraits hanging on the walls, but I realize the hotel is not for me. Thankfully, it doesn’t look like they have bahama beds, so at the very least, lodgers may get some rest here in between all the things SoBe has to offer.

Brian Gorman, who opened Lords, surveyed 20,000 gays around the US to find out if they had the choice, would they stay in a hotel aimed at them? Survey said… Yes! Once he determined he had an audience, he found Dan Mazzarini and Brian Humphrey who designed the 54 room hotel. And design they did – in a record time of only four months.

Look for more Lords Hotels to open in towns like LA, Vegas, New York and of all places, San Francisco. No word yet on Key West or Provincetown.

All pictures from lordssouthbeach.com

Oh, sure, there is a rich Cuban culture and interesting history — but no cares about that when they’re dancing at 3 a.m. at Nerve Lounge or sitting on the sandy beaches getting more vitamin D than Snooki — but if you want to enjoy another bit of the Miami life, you’re going to need to stay and one of those cool, artsy boutique hotels.

That’s part of the thinking of the new website www.MiamiBoutiqueHotels.com. Run by and developed for the Greater Miami Convention and Visitors Bureau, the site is actually the second version of it — it’s been around for 10 years. But now, it now has a much more David Carusa CSI Miami feel to it.

More importantly, it actually connects potential vsitors to about 90 boutique hotels in Miami — as well provides some deals the hotels might be offering, nearby attractions and things to do and even a very cool webcam page that lets you get live looks at different places in Miami. (We love webcams and this morning watched the sun rise over Biscayne Bay instead of the same ball of fire rising above Lake Erie, where HTG is based.) We did notice a few quirks on the site, including some of the links don’t work from the specials page — hint, webmaster, click here and then try to link to the

Webcam view of Biscayne Bay.

Avalon Hotel Summer Especial. Here’s the right link.

But most computer savvy travelers can figure out how to type Avalon Hotel into google and then keep the planning on a run.

“Boutique hotels have played a big role in the destination’s renaissance with the restoration and preservation of many art deco era properties,” said Tony Goldman, chairman and CEO of The Goldman Properties Company, owner of two boutique hotels and architect of the GMCVB’s boutique hotel program.  “Today the program continues to evolve utilizing the latest technology and resources further establishing Greater Miami as a destination that can accommodate every traveler’s  interest.”

Photos are screen shots the new website.

But now, Gray Line is rolling out its topless double decker buses for hop on hop off tours of the gateway to the Caribbean. The bus tours, which cost $39 per person, according to Gray Line’s website, allow every adult to bring two children for free — meaning a family of four tours for $78.

The tour buses will whisk you past the art deco district, Little Havana and along A1A to South Beach, allowing you disembark enjoy and then catch the next bus to continue the journey.

Having tried a few of these kind of tour buses in the past — in places like Dublin, London and Boston, for the most part, they’re not a bad deal. It’s not so much the hop on, hop off aspect, but more of the ability to relax and get a real sense of a city. There’s only so much history you can read in Lonely Planet while you’re exploring — as every moment you’re reading, you’re not looking at the city around you.

The downside to these buses is if you get off at one location, enjoy for 20 minutes and then want to move on, well, in some instances you may have to wait two hours before the next bus arrives. There’s also the problem if you’re at the end of the day and find a place you want to stay — getting back on your own is your problem. (Though really, you can easily take a taxi from most places in Miami.)

That said, the biggest advantage of these buses is that you don’t have to drive in Miami. Having recently driven in Southern Florida on our Key West extravaganza, we can tell you the drivers down there are totally insane — crazy — loco. Miami has some of the worst drivers in the world. Period.

So if you don’t want to take your life in your own hands, a big giant double decker bus just might be the way to go. It’ll get you to many of the tourist locations such as the Fountainbelau, the Bass Museum and Jungle Island; and then take you to the beach where you can decide to go topless if you really want to — though you’ll likely end up in jail.

Just because you didn’t (or won’t) marry an actual prince doesn’t mean you can’t feel like a king or queen and travel in proper (that’s “prop-ah”) style. Tons of tony resorts are offering special Royal Wedding packages and deals in honor of the upcoming nuptials. Help William and Kate celebrate in style by booking a trip to sunny St. Kitts, Curacao, or St. Thomas, or opt to stay state-side in Florida. You can watch the ceremony via YouTube with your feet in the sand and a fruity drink in your hand.

All of the offers below are valid for reservations booked between 12:00 am and 11:59 pm on Friday, April 29^th ONLY.

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CUISINART RESORT & SPA

www.cuisinartresort.com

Offer: In celebration of England’s Royal Wedding, CuisinArt Resort & Spa is offering the “Royalty in Paradise” package on April 29th, 2011.

Package includes:

- 4 Nights in a beachfront junior suite

- 1 Romantic beachfront dinner for two

- 1 Bottle Veuve Cliquot champagne

- 1 Couples Rendezvous spa package:

- Couples massage

- Floral bath soak

- Anguillian coconut pineapple scrub

- Swiss duet rain shower

Rates: From $2,250 (A $925 savings)

Valid for Travel: April 30 – November 22, 2011. Based on availability, blackout dates apply.

Reservations: www.cuisinartresort.com

CASAMAGNA MARRIOTT CANCUN RESORT

www.casamagnacancun.com

Offer: In celebration of England’s Royal Wedding, the CasaMagna Marriott Cancun Resort is offering the “Royal Romance Package,” available for one day only on April 29th, 2011.

Package includes:

- Transportation to and from the Cancun Airport
- Daily breakfast buffet for 2 adults
- One bottle of sparkling wine per stay
- Free upgrade to Ocean view (room already upgraded at the time of booking)
- 40% discount on Spa treatments
- 20% discount on food and beverage, and gift shop purchases

Rates: From $149 USD per night

Valid for Travel: May 1 – November 20, 2011. Based on availability, blackout dates apply.

Reservations: Visit www.casamagnacancun.com ; use promo code L9Z

JW MARRIOTT CANCUN RESORT & SPA

www.jwmarriottcancun.com

Offer: In celebration of England’s Royal Wedding, the JW Marriott Cancun Resort & Spa is offering the “Royal Romance Package,” available for one day only on April 29th, 2011.

Package includes:

- Transportation to and from the Cancun Airport
- Daily breakfast buffet for 2 adults
- One bottle of sparkling wine per stay
- Free upgrade to Ocean view (room already upgraded at the time of booking)
- 40% discount on Spa treatments
- 20% discount on food and beverage and gift shop purchases

Rates: From $189 USD per night

Valid for Travel: May 1 – November 20. Based on availability, blackout dates apply.

Reservations: Visit www.jwmarriottcancun.com; use promo code L9Z

HOTEL KURA HULANDA SPA & CASINO, CURACAO

www.kurahulanda.com

Offer: the Royal Treatment Package includes three night accommodations in a Deluxe Room and a half-day of pampering at the spa for two guests. Spa treatments include a 50 minute relaxing massage, 60 minute food reflexology and your choice of a Mini Facial or Gentleman’s Total Care Facial.

Rates: Three night package: $1,180

Valid for Travel: Now until Dec. 23, 2011

Reservations: Call 877-264-3106 or email reservations@kurahulanda.com

SANDPEARL RESORT / CLEARWATER BEACH, FLORIDA

www.sandpearl.com

Offer: Enjoy a royal getaway to the Sandpearl Resort in Clearwater Beach, Florida, when you book the “Royal Romance Berries & Bubbly Package” on April 29, 2011. The package includes accommodations in a luxury room or resort suite category of choice, champagne and chocolate dipped strawberries on the night of arrival, and complimentary breakfast for two each morning- a package savings of over 20 percent.

Rates start at: $299 per night

Valid for travel: April 29 through December 30, 2011

Reservations: Visit www.sandpearl.com and use promo code ROYAL in the Corporate / Promotion box, or call 1-877-726-3111 and ask for promotional code ROYAL.

MORNING STAR MARRIOTT BEACH CLUB/ ST. THOMAS, US Virgin Islands

www.marriott.com/hotels/travel/sttfr/

Offer:  The “Royal Bliss Package” includes accommodations in room category of choice, bottle of champagne and rum punch drink upon arrival, welcome gift, $200 food and beverage credit per room for entire stay, and breakfast buffet for two each morning.- a package savings of 20 percent.

Rates start at: $288 per night

Valid for travel: April 29 through December 30, 2011

Reservations: Visit www.marriott.com/hotels/travel/sttfr/ and use promo code EAT in the Corporate/ Promotion box, or call 1-800-524-2000 and ask for promotional code EAT.

ST. KITTS MARRIOTT RESORT

www.stkittsmarriott.com

Offer: In celebration of England’s Royal Wedding, St. Kitts Marriott Resort is offering a free room upgrade and bottle of sparkling wine when the “Escape! For Two” package is booked on April 29th, 2011, only.

Package includes:

-Accommodations (automatic room upgrade)

-1 massage per person (per room, per stay)

-1 facial per person (per room, per stay)

-Breakfast buffet for two, daily

-1 Bottle of sparkling wine

-Spa amenity basket and welcome gift

Rates: From $238 per room/night, inclusive of tax and gratuity. Based on double occupancy.  Subject to availability / blackout dates.

Reservations: www.stkittsmarriott.com / Promo code ES8

MIAMI MARRIOTT BISCAYNE BAY

www.marriottbiscaynebay.com

Offer: The “Royal Escape Package” includes complimentary breakfast for two and a bottle of champagne and strawberries upon arrival.

Rates: From $239 per night

Reservations: Call 305.374.3900 or visit www.marriottbiscaynebay.com; use promotional code ROM

There’s just no place like it on the face of the Earth. And right off of Duval Street, right around the corner, is Simonton Court — an old cigar factory converted into a compound of tranquility.

During HTG’s recent trip to Key West, we came across Simonton Court through the tourist office. It was a few days before New Years Eve and we needed a place to stay. Simonton Court was the most expensive in the group of slim pickings at $300 a night– and worth every penny. (Rooms vary in price from $515 a night for the most expensive high-season suite (with two bedrooms) to $160 a night for a regular room during the low season.)  While the $500  price tag may sound a bit much, if two couples went in on it, it would only be $250 a night per couple.

When we walked up to our Key West Cottage, a stand alone building for just us, complete with a private porch and hot tub, we knew we were in for a treat. The furnishings in the room are elegant and simple. The wood floors are beautiful.

Plus, we could easily sit outside, light up a cigarette and just enjoy the evening.

When you walk around the courtyard everything is lush and green and covered in Christmas lights. It’s an oasis a block away from bedlam of raucous drinkers and merry makers.

One evening, in between happy hour and the rest of the night, we snuck away from the downtown, went back to our room and soaked in the hot tub, just to, well, just to. One of the biggest advantages of Simonton Court is that you’re so close to everything that it’s easy to walk back to your room during the middle of the day. Places farther away would suck up a chunk of your day of drinking and Hemingway shopping.

Additionally, the breakfasts at at SC were excellent with hot coffee, giant bagels and delicious fruit — there were all of the typical fare available served up by the friendly staff.

We didn’t take advantage of the Concierge service, but it is available to help you book just about anything on the island or floating nearby. They will also help you plan out things to do if you want, you can contact them at 800-944-2687 or simontoncourt@aol.com.

Luxury comes with a price — and at Simonton Court, it was worth it.

The last time someone succeeded with this railroad to Miami thing was the Florida Land boom of the 1920s. Sure, that’s what Florida needs, more people moving down to South Eastern Florida where there is not a piece of land left to build on, water is scarce and highways are vast. Oh, and keep in mind that the light rail service between Miami and West Palm called Tri-Rail, is available to carry people because no one rides it.

When Florida Governor Rick Scott turned down the second installment of the high speed rail stimulus of $2.4B, it sent proponents of high speed rail into a tizzy. The Federal Government, the biggest proponent of high speed rail, sent Transportation Secretary, Ray LaHood, on a weekend trip down to Florida to talk some sense into Governor Scott.

Scott turned down the money saying that the costs to maintain and subsidize the rail lines in the future would be too costly to the tax payers of Florida. LaHood, in his appeal to Scott to revitalize the rail project, explained there would be oodles of jobs for Floridians (because Floridians are known for their train building) and outlined the potential for economic and tourism growth (if you build it, more will come).

FL Gov. Scott & Ray LaHood

LaHood gave Governor Scott another week to rethink his decision of derailing the project. It’s an offer he certainly can’t refuse, right? Who doesn’t want free money from the Fed? Wisconsin?

The need for the rail is obvious. People really, really, really need to go to Disney World. Sometimes they can’t get a flight to Orlando, so they fly into Tampa and then they have to drive 95 miles to Orlando in a car that they would have rented regardless of where they landed. In the future, they’ll fly to Tampa, buy a $100 ticket per person to ride the train to Orlando which will drop them off right in front of the rental car agencies at the Orlando airport.

View of Daytona 500 track, ground level

There is something cool to look forward to, though, and it has something to do with watching really fast cars going round and round in circles for a long, long time. It’s the Daytona 500, slated for February 20^th in Daytona Beach, and it’s not just for trailer folk anymore. Granted, the tickets arehard to come by and cost a pretty penny, but there’s nothing like the smell of barbeque, burning rubber and bubbly beer with a few thousand of your closest friends.

If you can’t manage landing—or affording—tickets to this year’s big race, do yourself a biggie and check out the next best thing to being there: the Daytona 500 Experience, the official attraction of NASCAR, in Daytona Beach, Florida.

The place (museum/attraction, really) flat out rocks, even if you’re not the typical NASCAR type, with interactive attractions such as “Acceleration Alley,” the motion simulator ride where you pick your own car, strap yourself in, and feel every bump and crash while maneuvering the course; the Coca-Cola 3D IMAX Theatre, a larger-than-life movie ride that’s not meant for the faint of heart or pregnant persons; and last year’s winning car on display for you to inspect and photograph.  Take a narrated tram track tour of the Daytona International Speedway and you’ll gain a new respect for the drivers who navigate the course’s 30-degree bank turns and straightaways at G-force, triple-digit speeds. After you cross the finish line, get a souvenir photo taken in the winners’ circle at Gatorade Victory Lane—your image is super-imposed on the track with cheering fans behind you and fighter jets flying overhead. Pretty cool, even if it’s just fridge art.

View of track from Press Box

DAYTONA 500 FAST FACTS:

Distance- 500 miles (804.6 km)

Laps- 200

Speed- course engineered to allow for speeds 180 mph+

First race- 1959

AKA- “The Great American Race,” “The Super Bowl of stock car racing”

NASCAR- National Association of Stock Car Auto Racing

Last year’s winner ( Feb. 14, 2010)- Jamie McMurray; avg. speed 137 mph; Chevrolet (car make); race time 3:47:16.

This year’s race date- February 20, 2011

See the part 1 of this story here.

Robert’s been alone in the attic for years now, waiting. When Gene’s parents died, he inherited the Key West home and moved in with his wife. As he explored the attic, he rediscovered Robert and decided to bring him downstairs. It didn’t last long, as Gene’s wife was pretty sure a grown man with a doll was questionable, even in Key West. She sent Robert back to the attic. Gene set him up in a turret window, checking in on him often.

But, did Robert stay there?

Always ask first before you take that pic

Guests to the house often heard footsteps pacing back and forth coming from the attic, kids were afraid to walk by the house and people in general just thought Gene was a little off.

In 1972, Gene died and the house was sold. The new buyers didn’t know who was waiting for them, but quite quickly, the young daughter of the house found Robert sitting in the attic waiting for his new victim. The girl took to him immediately and the fun began again. Strange happenings and once the girl realized the doll was going to kill her, her parents removed the doll from the house.

What a curse: fix my eye, X-Box & marriage

Since Robert had such a reputation in Key West, there was only one place for him to go. The Martello Museum which is actually the Fort East Martello, built during the Civil War era. Robert is now on display, along with various artifacts from Key West and military memorabilia.

But what about Robert? What does he do now? Well, you might think he’s just sitting there but really, he’s watching who comes and goes. Who is polite and asks to take pictures before snapping madly away and who doesn’t. Who thanks him for the pictures and who doesn’t. It’s those who don’t who have problems later.

Some letters don't ask for forgiveness

Along the wall behind Robert’s display box, letters are tacked on the wall, most pleading with him to remove the curse that he put on them for not asking permission to take his picture. And then there are other letters showing that he’s not alone.

We didn’t ask to take his picture either, and one week later I did get a nail in my tire. Coincidence? We’ll never know, but luckily we did thank him as we left so the curse may end with having spent $250 on two new tires.

Robert the Doll sits in his museum box, still dressed in his little white sailor suit and holding his little stuffed lion. He waits. He watches. He wants… you to come and visit.

Go see Robert (but ask before taking his picture or you’ll be writing a letter too) at the Martello Museum in Key West. He’s there daily and you can see him 9:30 a.m to 4:30 p.m., or you can see him on the Ghosts & Gravestones Trolley tour which happens nightly.

The dead want to show you something

While in Key West, we stumbled upon a frightseeing tour. Frightseeing? Yes, Key West has it’s ghosts and there’s a tour company to take you to them. On foot or by trolley car, the Ghosts & Gravestones tour is entertaining as you wind through the streets of Key West stopping at various homes (now all bed and breakfasts) that house ghosts from days past.

The trolley ride is lively as your host tells tales of how ghosts walk the halls of this house or that bar. It takes a little longer than the foot tour, but you get an added bonus of going to the Key West Martello Museum and getting to meet Robert. Who is Robert? Well, he’s quite the doll, equipped with powers and his own Facebook page and the ability to inspire a movie about a little red headed doll named Chucky.

Robert and his stuffed lion

As the story goes, in 1904 Robert the Doll was given to young Robert Eugene (Gene) Otto by his servant who was displeased with her treatment by the Otto family and was well versed in the ways of voodoo. Robert took to the doll immediately and gave him the name Robert. The two of them were inseperable. They played together, shared secrets and even slept together. After a while though, things got weird.

Neighbors often noticed how the doll moved from window to window when nobody was home. The family would often hear the doll giggle. The last straw was when Gene began suffering nightmares, only to have his parents find him in his room, furniture upended and little Gene saying “Robert did it”.

The turmoil ended as Robert was put in the attic, away from little Gene. But, Robert wasn’t done.

Stay tuned – Part 2 of Robert the Doll is coming up in about 3 hours.

On a recent trip to Key West, it was a beautiful day leading up to a perfect sunset. Oh, and the entertainment was, well, it was interesting and fun. Remember, always tip the performers. This is how they get money for beer.